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This article describes some of the presuppositions put forth in Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP).
Neuro-Linguistic Programming, or NLP, is one way that we can learn more about ourselves and why we behave in the ways we do.
There are a number of presuppositions that this discipline is based on, and they resonated with me from the very beginning. Combined, these assumptions about people in general give me a much healthier and respectful perspective of human beings!
These are some of my favorites and I keep them in mind every day as I work with various people in a number of ways.
All Behavior and Experience Has a Positive Intention
The way in which we choose to respond or react to a specific situation is based on something positive that we hope to achieve. This is based on the perspective of the individual as to what is positive for them.
I may observe someone and wonder what the reason is that they are hurting themselves. This presupposition lets me ask "What positive intention does that person have for doing that?"
This may give me some insight into what the other person views as positive for them. And it may also clue me in to the thought that they are not yet seeing other options.
People Are Always Doing The Best That They Can
Very closely related to the previous presupposition, this one assumes that people choose the best possible option from all of the possible options that they are aware of. Again, the key is "options that they are aware of".
From the outsider, it may not be a very good option to take; but to the individual, it may be the only one they know about.
When we are aware of better choices, we will choose them.
Another way to say this is that people are not "broken". They do not need to be "fixed". What they may need is more choices!
People Already Have All Of The Resources That They Need
I LOVE this one! It is SO empowering!
The original version of this included "...to deal with their current situation or problem." When working on an issue, people know the answer, because it will be the best possible answer...FOR THEM!
The challenge then is that when a person faces a problem for which they have "no" solution, something is preventing them from seeing the answer that they already have!
As a practitioner of NLP, I don't need to have answers. In fact, the answers that I have are only valid for me. My role is to help tease the answers out that are already there in the person.
The Meaning of our Communication is the Response We Get
Did you ever have the experience of talking with someone, then scratching your head in wonder as to how they interpreted what you said the way they did?
Working backwards, the response you got from that person was because of the way in which you communicated something to them.
Understanding how they communicate will help you better communicate with them. Understanding the filters through which they interpret your words and body language will help greatly in you being able to generate the desired understanding in the other person.
There is No Such Thing as Failure, Only Feedback
This is probably my very favorite! And the best way to illustrate this is with a story told by my NLP instructor, Carla Camou:
Imagine driving down the highway and your car veers to the left a bit causing the tires to run over the raised bumps in the center line of the road. Would you pull your car to the side of the road, shut it off and throw the keys out the window saying "I'm a rotten driver and shouldn't be on the road!" Or would you just ease your car to the right a bit and back into your lane?
How many times has something happened to you and you felt like "I'm a rotten person for doing that!" when all you needed to do was make a little course correction in your life?
We truly only fail when we ignore the feedback and stop trying!
Anyone Can Learn to do Anything
Another way to say this is "If one person can do something, then anyone can learn to do it."
Other people have learned to become an astronaut. Therefore, I could learn to become an astronaut. Now, at 50, it's unlikely that I COULD become an astronaut! And luckily, it's not high on my list!
We are learning animals! We never stop learning! What distinguishes people is how they ACT on their learning!
What I like best about these presuppositions is that I now look at people as full of potential with all of the things they need to achieve what they want within their reach! When someone comes to me and professes to be stuck, I look for ways to get their energy moving again so they can find the answers within themselves.
And it is WONDERFUL to see the light bulb come on and the movement get started again in a person!
Because that's when growth and enlightenment happens for us all! |
Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) 
